Friday, 31 July 2015

TEMPERAMENT TRAITS

Human beings are too complex to be described as being this or that. One might fit into one or two of these classification. Don't you think it's necessary to know why one should have the knowledge of temperament traits? Of course, it is necessary. Knowing your temperament trait distinguishes you. It brings about uniqueness. You'll know why you are different from other people. You'll know why you do some of the things you do. You won't dare do what you're not capable of doing, that is, you'll recognize your limits. You'll stop blaming friends and acquaintances for their actions but learn how to help them with their weaknesses. Having a knowledge of your trait will build your confidence. Above all, it helps you in choosing the right partner and knowing your partner's strengths and weaknesses so that you can pick them up when they are falling and bring out the good potentials in them, vice versa.

Temperaments are ways of classifying a person's normal manner of thinking, behaving or reacting and emotional attitudes. Temperaments are just one of the classifications of human personality. Succinctly, temperament traits has four basic classifications which are: Melancholic, Sanguine, Choleric and Phlegmatic. These are going to be dealt with sequentially.

1. Melancholic
Fundamentally, Melancholics are introverts, thinkers and pessimists(sadists). Those are the very first thing you'd notice about them.
STRENGTHS- They are thoughtful, analytical, poetic in nature, talented, purposeful, artistic and musical, appreciative, conscientious, self sacrificing, genius, intelligent, sensitive to others, always concerned, organized, economical, sees the problem, finds creative solution to problems, makes friends cautiously, faithful and devoted, good listener.

WEAKNESSES- Remembers the negative, sadist, moody, depressed, less humorous, off in another world, that is, they don't see things the way others do, poor self image, self centred, possessive, feels guilty, too meticulous, put blames of kids, procrastinates, difficult to please, needs to be approved, suspicious of people, gets angry easily, unforgiving easily.

In summary, a melancholic will want everything done right, doesn't want to be a public figure, careful when choosing friends and partner and are always depressed. To avoid having clash with melancholics, don't argue with them, avoid too many jokes, make them feel important, go extra mile asking them what the problem is because they are pretty emotional but would hide it, be compassionate with them.

2. Sanguine
Basically, people with sanguine personality are loquacious, humorous and demonstrative.
STRENGTHS- Appealing personality, garrulous, emotional, storyteller, life of the party, centre of attraction, enthusiastic, expressive, cheerful, jovial, friendly, curious, good on stage, innocent, sincere at heart, makes home fun, turns disaster into humor, volunteers for job, thinks up new activities, have good memory of colors, inspires others, thrives on compliments, makes friends easily, envied by others, doesn't hold grudges, apologies quickly, prevents dull moments.

WEAKNESSES- Extrovert, optimist, compulsive talker, exaggerates and elaborates, tend to lie due to that, egoistical, complains a lot, gets upset easily, never grows up, disorganized, forgets children's appointment, bad listener, lacks confidence, decides by feelings, easily distracted, undisciplined, forgets obligations, hates to be alone, needs to be popular, repeats stories, forgetful.

In summary, having known that sanguine is disorganized, you can remind your sanguine partner or friend to pick up his or her things when scattered. You can help him or her to stop being talkative by changing the topic of discussion when it's getting prolonged. Don't be surprised when your sanguine partner makes too much friends from the opposite sex and note that it doesn't mean they are cheating, they just don't want to be alone and such partner requires you to spend more time with him or her. Help sanguine friends build their confidence too.

3. CHOLERIC
Essentially, Cholerics are born leader.
STRENGTHS- Bossy, active, must correct wrongs, decisive, independent, unemotional, organizes parties and meetings well, stimulates activity, has little need for friends, will work for group activities, excels in emergency, dynamic, not easily discouraged.

WEAKNESS- Compulsive need for change, rude, inflexible, quick tempered, impatient.

In summary, expect change of behavior in individuals like this, encourage them when they need you to, be patient with them when angry and help them to improve their anger issue, don't get upset when they are rude to your family. They don't like listening to advice most times, all you need do is to be patient with them.

4. PHLEGMATIC
Individuals with phlegmatic personality are easy going, gentle to the core and don't get upset easily.
STRENGTHS- Introvert, watcher, pessimist, low key personality, easy going, relaxed, collected, patient, kind, keeps emotions and feelings hidden, have time for family, can accept good with bad, steady, peaceful, agreeable, avoids conflict, gets along well.

WEAKNESSES- Dry sense of humor, enjoys watching people, has manu friends, worrisome, fearful, indecisive, avoids responsibility, selfish, shy, too compromising, self righteous, not goal oriented, lacks self motivation, hard to get moving, lazy, careless, stays unconcerned, judges others, teasing, resist change.

In summary, help them to stop being lazy, careless and to stop taking things with frivolity. If you belong to one or two of the above elaborated temperament traits, help yourself to be a better so that you can have a meaningful life and avoid conflicts with partners, family, friends and co workers.

Thanks for reading!

Sunday, 26 July 2015

DISCOVERING YOU

By Adeyera Abisola

A lot of people don't actually know who they are, there purpose in life, and where they are headed in life. I love saying this: "when the purpose of a thing is not known, abuse is inevitable". Abuse in what sense? You might be forty and still haven't discovered who you are. You would keep wondering and struggling with why you are not happy, and you begin to ask yourself, are you being selfish? Are your expectations too high? You begin to wonder what is missing. What's going on here? You failed to plan! It's very paramount that you know who you are, what makes you genuinely happy, what your core personal values are, what your priorities are. Most importantly, where you are headed in life. The answers are right inside of you. Trust that intuition in your gut. It's in you.

When you ask most people who they are, their response are pervaded with a description of their physical self, the number of cars and houses they possess, their likes and dislikes and what they do at leisure. We are not talking about personality here. Pardon me brother or sister, if that's the only thing you can say about yourself, you're yet to find who you are. Ask yourself, are these who I am? Do they clearly define me or they are just what I've decided to label myself? Are these my values?

KNOWING YOUR VALUES

Values exist whether you've discovered it or not. Values are elements of your life
which you find personally important. Knowing your values guide you in making the right decision. If your core personal value is your family, would you take a job that'll keep you away from them for six months? If you can't cope with impatience, would you marry a man that has such trait? If u can't stand seeing a cadaver, would you put in for a course like Anatomy or Medicine? If you do, you will end up being frustrated.

1. Identify when you were most proud
2. Identify when you were happiest.
3. Identify what contributed to your happiness

At 16, I've discovered my values. My dreams of writing about things are truly
meaningful to me, becoming a medical doctor, finding a satisfying and passionate family, being more present with my family, becoming a good cook, becoming a fashion designer,  being a loving mother to my kids, being a loyal wife and lot more. The dreams are coming true now that I am focused in the right direction—and that direction was to look within. So, find a quiet moment and think about each question. Go ahead. Create new dreams or rediscover dreams you left behind. This would help you with choosing a career that suits you, knowing your purpose, what you believe in and live a meaningful life. Now that I have started, I haven’t looked back since, I feel I'm exactly where I'm supposed to be at the moment.

Monday, 13 July 2015

SUCCESS- MY VIEW POINT

Success is more than winning, it's about solving problems and resolving difficulties, it's about bouncing back when you get hooked down. It is simply your attitude towards handling failure.

"I strived to extricate myself from tangled webs of failure, you too can if you ditch that resisting habitual act of settling for failure and accepting it as fate. No, you've fallen once, twice or even thrice might make you think you've failed. Well, quite acceptable, you can say so, but it's more than that. It only means you've not succeeded and your effort is required. You might have truly failed somehow, but, I want to reassure you that you're not a failure yet unless you settle to be"-Abisola

In actual sense, what does success really entails? The number of BScs, MScs or Phds you've hung on your wall? The medals, treasures and trophies in your cupboard or wardrobe? All the money you've got in your bank vault? YES! All of these can mean success but it's more than that. Though, success is also not necessarily acquiring fame, wealth or fortune, though, it has been affirmed as an aspect of success. Our perception of success should not exclude money and material needs of life for without these, we cannot thrive in life. Success is when you've solved a problem and this perceived to be solved problem spawns new problem and challenges you to solve them proficiently and you are still able to conquer the problem. Yeah, that's when you've succeeded.

Success is really an unending process, it is a continual process, you've just gotta keep at it. It is discovering, exploring and revealing the inbuilt God given potentials in you. Success just means coping with the unusual recurring problems around you.

Real success for women is when you can confidently stare right into your man's face that "Yes, I made it". It is to be proud to be who you are now, what you've encountered, faced and how you've overcome them. Some people haven't discovered themselves. For more information on that, see my blog adeyeraabisola@blogsolpot.com. Success is to be able to say at least I was able to utilize my 13 trillion brain cells. Additively, success is building your own self, to excel exceedingly at what you do to make people around you proud of you. Success is when you earn respect for yourself.

That you quit a bad habit for a good one is a form of success. Your positive attitude should be able to influence the life of several others and through them, thousands of other lives were also liberated. They got inspired by what you passed down. Later on, a flash of your success will continue to be a source of inspiration and it will make you want to do more. As you go on in life, you'll surely experience stop-overs, it requires discipline and determination to becone successful.

Conclusively, dream success, desire success, eat success, pursue success,b live success, breathe success. Give it all it takes. It doesn't happen accidentally, you plan to make it happen and it takes pain to be successful. Try to be uncomfortable for a while to be comfortable forever. Pay now and play later.

MY DESIRE

I'm wonderfully and wholly made by God. I am intelligent, no doubt, I've got ideas, I know. But, I'm not really living up to my potentials. Something is wrong somewhere. The world is not fair. The world is cruel. This is not God's plan for my life. I want God to reveal his undiluted plans for me. I have chosen to be in a medical field, well, yes because I believe I can make it. Though, in secondary school, especially in SS1, I never enjoyed subjects like biology, it was calculations for me then. I thought I had this analytical skills until I was shown the way to GHI. God bless Uncle Femi! Uncle Femi is a very great man, he's a disciplinarian and he's capable of spoon feeding you anything you wish to know. There, I was monitored and guided, I became interested in a medical profession. I felt I want to be around people and make things happen. I want my skills and knowledge to be in demand. I wanted something challenging. I wanted constant amelioration. I want to be respected in the society. I was ready to go ahead. During my first year, I performed fairly. I didn't really know what medical courses entail, I studied like I was studying for WAEC. I was kind of down. I stood up again and kept encouraging myself. I knew I was shallow minded. I kept trying, I needed to study more, I needed to be more prayerful. I knew God was my strength. I never had the idea of sitting for so long and staying up late with textbooks, despite that I was preparing for a weeding exam. Though, I did little of that. During second semester, something struck me. The courses were becoming hard, especially Anatomy and Physiology. Now plain nervous system, almost succeeded in getting my head off my neck then. I want to be better. I want to be the best. I want to be good at a what I do. I believe in hard work and prayers. I'm determined. I have to do it. I want to take up challenges. I don't want to be afraid of making mistakes. I know it takes lots of doings. When you're passionate about something, have fun, you'll learn to love it and that's when it clicks.

DON'T BE STAGNANT

I think human beings are here to get some things done and get it done successfully. I'm here for a purpose. You're here for a purpose. I think I'm here not to slumber or fall asleep. Be awakened! There's an urgency! Make a
difference in the world today, the world of your time, the time you're still alive, strong, agile and vibrant. Be the best of that peculiar you. Reading, writing, poetry, teaching, they are part of helping the world. Don't be stagnant, my dear.

A WOMAN OF THE PEN

I'm a woman of the pen, I'm so thrilled and electrified by writing, I'm so lost in love with the written words, my soul dances to the rhythm of written words, as they sing to my heart. I cherish writing, I find solace and comfort in it. With a pen, I just could change the world of my time. But hey! Here is an important perception and notification: How can a writer get by without BOOKS? If you hate reading books forget and quit writing, this might seem harsh but pardon me because I mean no harm, no offences, but, a writer should desire pleasure in reading, studying and thinking. That's what builds you. It keeps you at pace. I'm a voracious reader and a devoted writer. I never will let go of this great dream of mine. Hence, I feel the need to consume more books at all times. Reading, for me, is satisfying. It gives me this inner joy. It is beautiful. It is SEXY. When I'm reading, I feel I'm in another planet, as in out of this world.

MAKE THE MOST OUT OF YOUR NIGHT

The night is for passion, it's for fanaticism, it's for trouble. It's for romance. It's when you're most tender, authentic and suppressed. You come out to play under the nonjudgmental eyes of the stars. It's for all those things you could never dream of doing during the day become possible under the watchful eyes of the sun.

Only in the dark can we learn, absorb and study the effect of the day. Few human make use of their nights. Some are busy snoring, sleeping, partying and all those. It's by night that you're not disturbed by people's activities and noise. You are so free from distractions. Night is the time to unleash your innermost desires, cravings and potentials.

The night is for testing your limits and challenging yourself. It's for breaking down all those rules your parents made to protect you. It's for ruminating on what was being taught in class. Geniuses have their breakthrough at night. Come alive, it's the time couples have the most of out of sex.

What is it you're awaiting? It's time to dig into those hidden corners of your subconscious mind.

My dreams of becoming a nurse, a medical doctor, a fashion designer and a writer were all discovered at night.